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Off To A Good Start

reprinted from family ties
Fall 2005

It’s that time of the year when you hear the familiar “where did the summer go?” question. Despite the fact that most schools are now waiting to open their doors until after Labor Day, it still seems impossible to believe that summer is coming to a close. As a parent and educator I know only too well that the weeks just prior to the start of a new school year are filled with ambivalent feelings for children and parents alike. Children know they will miss their summer schedule and activities yet feel the excitement of returning to school. Parents are looking forward to settling into a routine while feeling a bit anxious about the transitions that are in store for their children. Many times the concerns regarding transitions are more significant for parents who have children with special needs.

Parents often tell me they are uncertain about when and how to approach new staff with information regarding their child’s special needs. They worry about overwhelming teachers at the beginning of a school year, yet have legitimate concerns about waiting to share information that may be of value to the staff during the first weeks of school. One of the most effective ways I have seen this information shared with school staff is through a simple letter of introduction. The letter is an informal document that provides family insights into a child’s interests, strengths and needs and can give school staff a “heads up” on trigger areas that elicit anxiety, social confusion, aggression, etc. Some of the information may already be incorporated into the child’s IEP, however, while that document guides the educational experience for the year, the letter of introduction is based on family experiences over time and helps new staff understand what is and is not effective when dealing with specific issues. It’s a family’s opportunity to tell a teacher about their child’s unique personality and interests. The letter can offer specific solutions for difficult settings as a means of helping staff during those first weeks of school when they are getting to know a child. Educators have told me they appreciate the letter of introduction approach, as they can read the information as time permits. They have also noted that it helps them understand a child through the eyes of the family.

Many times school teams and families find it valuable to meet briefly during the first few weeks of the school year. Although this is a very busy time of the year, I often hear that these meetings actually save time and, more importantly, develop a positive, open line of communication for the school year. I would suggest that the collaborative meeting include the regular and special education staff working with the child, the administrator, the family, and any outside specialists involved with the child. This meeting gives everyone the opportunity to meet, ascertain roles and responsibilities and to learn from each other. This is a great time to determine how communication will “flow” between home and school, school and outside specialists, etc. In a nutshell, it is a meeting where communication and trust can be developed so small kinks can be worked out before they become time-consuming problems.

Once the “dust settles” and the school year is in full swing, parents may want to ask the staff when they can observe in their child’s classroom. Observations provide parents with the opportunity to learn about instructional accommodations that are being implemented in their child’s program. The IEP will tell families what a child will be learning while the observation will help clarify how teachers go about teaching the skills. It also provides parents with the opportunity to see how various behaviors are addressed as well how their child responds socially in the school setting. An observation just prior to the annual IEP meeting will help clarify the present level of performance information that is shared at the meeting. All of this being said, it is important to remember observation etiquette. During the observation, the primary goal should be that the flow of classroom activity be as unaffected by the observer’s presence as possible. The observer should make themselves inconspicuous which would include not following or towering over the child being observed. No eye contact should be made with any student who may be exhibiting inappropriate or attention-seeking behaviors. Of course, it goes without saying that no other children should accompany a family member during the observation. Classroom observations can be a wonderful springboard for dialogue and exchange of information between families and teachers, however any post-conversations with should be prearranged and not take place during class time.

By far, the most frequent concern I hear expressed when talking to families is homework. Many times families feel as though their lives during the school year revolve around homework and, not surprising, frustration and resentment quickly set in. It appears that the most common homework accommodation centers around the amount of time spent on homework. For the most part, I have found this to be ineffective. Teachers, with best intentions, “predict” the amount of time it will take to complete the homework, but frequently and for a variety of reasons, the homework takes longer to complete. I have found it to be much more effective to look at homework accommodations in a different manner. First and foremost, we (educators and families) need to look at what the research has to say about homework. Then the special needs of the child need to be considered. Last and certainly not least, we need to keep in mind the other responsibilities of families and their desire to spend quality time with their children as they play board games, take walks and read books together. When homework takes up entire evenings, sibling and/or spouse pathology can easily develop. Families need to communicate with the school staff when homework is dominating family life.

Families not only have the right, but the responsibility to be advocates for their children. Educational services are maximized when issues are discussed in a respectful, proactive, positive manner and families, schools and agencies work together in the best interest of children. Best wishes for a school year filled with growth and positive communication!